Discussing Divorce With Children

Divorce is a scary word for most children in this generation. After all, even if they haven't been through it in their own families, they will most likely have friends who have dealt with the blow. Although they may not quite understand what the whole thing is about, they've heard the horror stories of daddies being gone, new mommies, being forced to move, step-siblings, and other gruesome details that divorce creates. If you and your spouse are going to separate, it's best to sit down with your children and explain it so they don't have unnecessary fears.

Children often blame themselves for their parents breakups. Divorce is too difficult for them to process. Even if his friend is affected, he may think that it will affect his family in the future. You will need to reassure your child that this isn't going to happen. Since children often blame themselves, you will need to tell them that this isn't the case.

Let the child ask any questions he has and be honest with your answers. Since the issue can be difficult to process, make sure you don't overload with too much information. Property settlements and legal agreements aren't important to little children. Make sure you only share information that appropriate for his age. After learning what he's feeling, you'll be in a better position to make him feel better. Just make sure you never speak negative about any of his parents. Be as matter of fact about the situation as you can be so that your anger doesn't worry your little one.

You should try to get your child to express his or her feelings. Make sure you sit down and talk about what's bothering him. Acknowledge that it's okay to feel angry or sad or whatever else he might be feeling. And don't make the mistake of thinking the child is too young to understand what's going on. Even if you think they're too small to know what's going on, you should address their feelings. Doc No.kslhwde-sdtlgh

Kristie Brown writes on a variety of topics from health to technology. Check out her websites on marriage counselors and free marriage advice